The Tube Is No Place for Passion
At 7:45 a.m., bleary-eyed and battling elbows on the Circle Line, the last thing anyone wants to witness is a couple aggressively snogging by the doors. The London Underground is already chaotic enough — a sweaty mix of commuters, coffee cups, and questionable body odour — without adding tongue-twisting romance into the equation.
The Tube Is No Place for Passion
Let’s be honest: the Tube is filthy. Studies show that pollution levels on the London Underground are 15 times higher than at street level, and scientists have found over 95 different strains of bacteria on its seats, poles, and walls. Add an early-morning make-out session to the mix, and it’s basically a microbiologist’s worst nightmare.
The Science of Saliva (and Why It’s Gross)
According to research from Princeton University, when people kiss, microscopic droplets of saliva can travel through the air in fractions of a second. Some people — dubbed “superemitters” — produce even more droplets, meaning your 8 a.m. commute could come with an unwanted side of airborne germs. Combine that with the powerful gusts of Tube tunnel air, and those droplets could travel up to six metres. Romantic? Not so much.
Commuter Reactions: From Disgust to Deep Reflection
One commuter who used to work at a dental practice summed it up perfectly:
“There are already Corsodyl adverts warning against gum disease — I don’t need a live demo of how to spread it. It’s gross, and it’s 7 a.m.”
But not everyone agrees. Life coach Jacqueline Hurst argues that maybe we’ve become too cynical. To her, public affection — even on the Tube — is a reminder that love still exists.
“We need less cynicism and more reminders of human connection,” she says. “If that happens on the Piccadilly line at 8 a.m., so be it.”
Is It Really About the Kiss?
Maybe what bothers us isn’t the PDA itself, but what it represents. Watching people be openly affectionate can trigger discomfort, envy, or even a reminder of our own emotional walls. Londoners are famously private on public transport — no eye contact, no conversation — so a sudden display of love can feel intrusive.
When a Morning Kiss Might Be Okay
Not everyone is anti-PDA. One Londoner admitted they’d allow a quick goodbye kiss — but only under special circumstances:
“If we’re both going to Euston and I’m heading to Scotland for two weeks, a snog before parting seems fair.”
Others pointed out that straight couples tend to feel freer expressing affection on the Tube, while queer people often have to think twice about safety and surroundings.
Final Thoughts: Keep Your Romance Above Ground
This isn’t about banning affection or feeding the “bitter single commuter” stereotype. It’s about respecting shared space — especially during the morning rush. The Tube is for coffee, calm, and quiet misery, not for re-enacting music video moments before sunrise.
So, next time love strikes underground, maybe save it for street level. London’s air might be cleaner — and the audience smaller.
